


Lovers

by CarnivalofBrokenDolls (yourrhinestoneeyes)



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Death, Ed's lovers, F/M, Light Sexual Content, Love, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-07
Updated: 2017-04-07
Packaged: 2018-10-15 20:48:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10557484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yourrhinestoneeyes/pseuds/CarnivalofBrokenDolls
Summary: Ed has had very few lovers in his life, but it seems each love ends in tragic deaths.





	

When he would hold her she felt small and fragile in his arms. She smelled sweet, there was a nice fruit scent to her hair, and her skin was soft beneath his touch. Kristen’s hair was bright red with slight curls to it, full lips painted pink. She would smile up at him with perfect white teeth, her eyes twinkling with light and love. Ed would kiss and caress every inch of her body, he would whisper loving praise against her skin, because he had wanted her to know she was the entire universe to him. He wanted her to feel protected and safe, he kissed her wrists and arms, all the places that before had been bruised from where Tom would grab her or hit her. She never had to worry about that with him, he treated her like a porcelain doll, like something he was terrified he could break if he squeezed too hard. 

Her throat beneath his hand had felt delicate. He could feel her hard swallows, feel the vibrations beneath her pale white skin as she tried to beg for him to just let her go. He couldn’t hear her over his own pleas for her to stay, to understand that he needed her. He wouldn’t hurt her he had sworn to her as he squeezed harder, his other hand over her mouth in desperation needing her to be quiet so she could hear him. She couldn’t scream, she needed to listen, or just relax so that she would be willing to sit on the couch and talk to him about this. 

Kristen’s lifeless body felt heavy in his arms when he cradled her. He rocked her and buried his face in her hair as he screamed and he cried, he needed her to wake up. He stroked her bare arms and begged for her to just come back to him, he hadn’t meant to hurt her. He wouldn’t have, but she had hit him and she had called him horrible things. He hadn’t meant to hurt her, he never would hurt her. He never meant to kill her.

 

Isabella had felt much the same way that Kristen had. She was soft and sweet, but Isabella smelled of vanilla. Her hair at one time had been platinum blond, always kept up instead of hanging loosely. Ed had been determined to keep things soft between them, to take it slow. He feared if he moved too quickly, if he just jumped into bed with her then things would go badly like they had with Kristen. 

It wasn’t until he walked into her apartment to find her looking like a ghost from his past that he learned he didn’t need to fear being intimate. His hand on her throat gave him the power of a God, the power to squeeze too tightly and end her life, to just snap her neck and be through with yet another beautiful girl. Instead he had found himself kissing her, both sides of his mind enraptured by this sensation of danger and fear. He feared himself, he feared what this was doing to him, but she wasn’t hurt. She was very much alive with her legs wrapped around his waist and his hands sliding up her thighs and up beneath her skirt. Her skin was soft and warm, they had barely made it to her couch. 

When she had died it hadn’t been by his hands, not this time. As he stared at her mangled corpse on the metal table he felt sick to his stomach. It wasn’t fair, he had done everything right this time. He hadn’t hurt her, he hadn’t scared her, or made her hate him. Isabella had known what type of person he was and she stayed with him despite the fact his darker nature terrified her, she accepted him. Then she died and some small part of himself whispered it was his fault, he couldn’t love somebody without dooming them in this life of his. He was meant to be alone, just him and the taunting voice lingering in his mind.

 

Oswald felt different than Kristen or Isabella. There was the obvious factor that he was a man and until recent months Ed had never exactly considered men in this way, but there Ed was lying in bed with Oswald straddling his lap. His hair felt short and soft beneath Ed’s fingers, he smelled of expensive cologne that he of course had to have imported like most things he enjoyed. His skin was soft and it wasn’t all at once. Ed’s full lips pressed against the scars on his freckled shoulders, his hands roamed over the body atop his own. He felt over each bump and indent that mapped out a painfully violent history, his lips moved down Oswald’s chest towards his stomach. He paused over a different scar, a fresher scar; Ed moved his fingers to the hideous circular scar.

He could hear the echo of the gun shot in his mind, he vividly remembered the look on Oswald’s face as tears fell from his bright green eyes. Ed had watched him sink into the water, into what was supposed to be a permanent grave.

Ed felt lips press against the top of his head, he continued to stare at the scar thinking about his dead girls. Their haunting glazed over eyes, Oswald’s eyes had had the same look as he had sunken to the bottom of the river.

Oswald took Ed’s face in his hands forcing him to look up at him, with his thumbs he brushed away the tears falling from his partner’s eyes. He kissed Ed’s forehead, the bride of his nose, and then his lips. He whispered for him to not think about it, it was in the past, and there was no time in the present to linger on painful memories. Ed nodded his head in agreement as he kissed back, he easily fell into the pattern of passion they had had before he had ruined it by getting stuck on that scar. 

He thought of how he never wanted to be rough with a romantic partner. He thought about how his father used to grab his mother by the arm and slam her into walls, yell at her, and hit her. Even at a young age Ed had sworn to himself he would never be that man, he felt he somehow turned into something much worse.

His thoughts distracted when Oswald began biting and sucking at the side of his neck, he found himself laughing at the slight tickling sensation the action caused him. Oswald pulled back looking a cross between annoyed and utterly embarrassed. Ed placed a hand against his cheek, fingers caressing his skin as he smiled at him. 

“I’m sorry” he whispered to him before pressing his lips against his.

Perhaps this was his actual second chance.


End file.
